So I need to rewind and take a look in the rear view mirror to see which pole I accidently hit...if it was JUST a pole.
For those of you who aren't in the mood for random rantings, I emplore you NOT to scroll down.
For those of you dare to, you're not allowed to sue me for any brain damage or psychiatric trauma caused by boredom.
FIRST up...this week's, (and last's), [and future's] driving lessons have been excrutiating.
Dates with my driving instructor Mr. Alex Soo always start out well, but end with a sour face, for both of us. He has this uncany ability to over estimate his students experience and tends to think we already know everything before he even teaches us.
On our 5th lesson he finally decided to start training me in the Shah Bandar circuit. So he totally assumed I could do everything on my own. Yeash~ including the frigging slope.
It happened like this:
1. I charged up the slope at 20kmph
2. Thinking I was supose to stop the car exactly in between the poles.
3. Before the first pole, he yanked hard on the hand brake.
4. I lurched forward and almost hit my head.
5. Thought I was gonna see the airbag (if there was any)
6. "OI! DIN I TELL U TO STOP BEFORE THE POLE? Seeeeee! Seeee! aiyooo look outside the window la! OI wind the window with your RIGHT HAND LA! LEFT HAND ON THE STICK! har...har ok put your head outside and see see! Tyre inside yellow line? ok now angkat tangan!"
7. "ok..."
Geez...Don't tell me what to do, SHOW me what to do la next time!
Rolled down the slope, thats when I saw CF and Kelvin waving Hiiii....! Oh pleasent surprise! But any kinda surprise was made unpleasent due to the stressfulness of the situation.
Parking and 3 Point turn were hell rides also. 3 Point turn being the lesser of the evils. CF and Kelvin had to see me being trash canned by my driving instructor. I take pity on your eyes...I hope no trauma has been caused. Didn't mean to ignore you guyz then...but I was concentrating xD. Geez...my first time lolz...spare a thought for the virgin OKAY!?!? Dammit...
On the way back, we met a REAL slope. The ramp from KeSas highway to Bandar Botanic. A chance to relive my nightmare except in a real life situation. What more can I ask for? This time I crawled up the slope...I had a real fear that the driving instructor was gonna pull the brake and send me flying out the wind screen. Suddenly saw a striped pole infront of me. OH GAWD! Looked again...Oh just a traffic light. Oh it turned red. Oh time to stop. Clutch. Brake. I pulled the hand brake. Free gear. Okay, sit back and relax.
Oh it turned green. Time to go. Clutch. Gear 1. Press oil. Eh, Gear 1 not engaged. Gear 1. EH??? WHY WONT THE GEAR MOVE? GEAR ONE! CMON!!! GEAR ONE GEAR ONE GEAR ONE GEAR ONE GEAR ONE GEAR ONE!!! OH Crap the truck infront of me is moving away! SHEET! I'm gonna get rammed from behind and I'm gonna dieeee! OI WHY WONT THE GEAR MOVE? TEKAN CLUTCH 99! STILL STUCK?!?! Mr. Alex gave me a stupendous look. There was a sense of awe in it, like..."wow...look at this idiot...amazing!".Asked me to press the clutch again, then he tried the gear. Nope, din't work. Yay we're going to heaven! Then he himself started panic. Nope he didn't want to see heaven so soon. So he started yanking on the gear stick with both hands. He looked as if he was trying to strangle some wild animal with mad cow disease. Or having some hardcore masturbation excersise with the gear stick. Either way, it was kinda fascinating to watch the usually calm and cool instructor go into a frenzy of trying to take out the gear box. Just when we thought he killed the gear, he tried a nastier approach, he started slapping the gear stick. Great...the gear stick has evolved from a wild beast into a badly behaved human child. *spank spank spank!* went Mr. Alex. Suddenly, the gear box kicked back into action! Woots! I shifted into gear 1 and squashed the accelerator. When I released the hand brake the car screamed up the ramp and down the slope. Me and Mr Alex shared a moment of silence.
"so...what went wrong with the gear stick..."
"old car."
lol?
Phew...Okay....
Jesus take the wheel~
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